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Dead Sea Almanac – April 15, 2019

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Featured Item

Today’s enchanted item is a spade worthy of doing all the work you do not wish to do! Produced by our very own Malfavhar and found wandering in his garden just waiting to be appropriated and resold, the Magic Spade is just the ticket for every worker looking to take a break while still impressing their taskmaster. Simply speak a command to the tool, and it will continue doing what it was told to do until something or someone stops it. Thanks to the technology of our very own sorcerous apprentice, it will even duplicate if damaged! What wonders of modern magic! We don’t even have to make more of them!


The Magic Spade is a tool with intelligence 4 that does whatever it is commanded to do. It has a basic grasp of English, but will interpret all commands literally, and is harder to stop than to get started. While starting it requires only a verbal command, stopping it in the course of whatever it is doing or changing its active command requires a DC 12 arcana check; failure results in no change in the spade’s behavior. Additionally, attempting to stop the spade using force will result in a minor problem of potentially epic proportions: any time the spade takes damage, the dungeon master rolls a d20. On a result of ten or higher, the spade splits into two spades at half health, even if it was previously at zero hit points. The spade starts with four hit points, and can clone itself at most once per round.

A Story From the Frontier

It is told to us, by the people of Anak, that one of their reputed archaeologists has gone missing, abducted off the street by a gang of masked criminals. Rumor has it that her work had taken her to investigations of Seya’s Tomb, and while we may never know if she found it, we hope that her knowledge isn’t exploited by whatever villainous group is responsible. The Tomb of Seya, and the resting place of her master Ieyta, are both to be considered cultural artifacts of great heritage, and should not be disturbed by treasure hunters. That being said, we’re sure there are also some secrets of ancient technology waiting to be discovered, and place a bounty of fifty crown on her safe return or other information leading to the discovery of the tomb, plus ten percent of royalties from magic products found therein. We are of course concerned primarily with the young woman’s safe recovery, rather than the potential profit.

In Other News

  • A fey named Lathan seeks the company of a group of adventurers for what he calls “a right good time.”
  • The Westport Fireworks Emporium is missing significant stock this morning after a break in late last night.
  • It is reported to us that there is increased outlaw activity around the salt mines; with tomorrow’s election coming quickly, we hope Mr. Marston has got his ducks in a row in his attempt to contest our beloved mayor.

Malfavhar’s Monday Madness

Today, Malfavhar travels to the realm of the Atlantean Queen, M’yella, to take a look at her personal work-room. Inside, he finds a most wonderous array of artifacts.

The Queen’s Quarters
1d12Item of Special Interest
1The royal sceptre of the Golden Throne, handed down through M’yella’s family through the eight generations since her house came to power, and peacefully acquired from the house before them
2The collected works of scholars stretching back millenia, including some in scripts you cannot read
3The trident and spear gun of a warrior, made of the finest brass and oak and kept well-oiled to preserve it from exposure to the elements
4A net with a gash in it from M’yella’s first wildlife rescue, to which is pinned a sketch of the dolphin she saved
5A piece of rock quartz cut to hold three candles, representing the dwarven ideals of peace, unity, and perseverance
6An ornamental cape showing the colors of Sariland and the insignias of the seven tribes
7The compass of a pirate the queen put to rest in her youth, battered from exposure to the elements but well-maintained regardless
8A scrying bowl and accoutrements, along with a note which reads “contact Marcella and K’vim about rising convoy”
9A pair of golden rings linked by a fine gold chain, which M’yella will someday use to bind herself to her chosen king consort at their wedding ceremony, just as her father and her grandmother did before her
10A well-made bed fit for a captain of the guard, but hardly for a queen, wedged in-between a dresser and a desk
11An entire room converted into a laboratory of fluid dynamics and current flows, with pour-troughs and sandbars and all manner of experiments in various states of progress
12A leather jerkin pierced by an arrow-hole and stained with blood, set behind the glass of a display case on the wall as part of a memorial to M’Yella’s fallen brother

A Description for the Masses

As you walk in, it’s clear that M’Yella lives in somewhat of a cramped space, which in itself is unusual for a queen. Furniture clustered in what would otherwise be the vestibule belies the size of the entire suite, which has four rooms deeper – a laboratory, a study, a hidden library accessed by a bookcase door, and a room for entertaining visitors who come in from the garden. Clearly, the queen’s priorities are divided between her life in private and in public, and just as clearly, she could not care less for the traditional privileges.

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